Mouse of the Rising Sun

I had mouse problems a few years back. I documented the vermin tales, tails, and trails here, here,here,and here. As the years passed, I built up a false sense of security. My mouse problems? Surely a thing of the past.

And then came Thanksgiving (which was also my birthday this year–yay, me!). I decided to make myself a quick peanut butter and jelly sandwich–clearly I wasn’t going to have enough to eat that day–so I went to the pantry to grab a loaf of bread. At first, I was confused by what I saw. The loaf was half-eaten, but from the side rather than the end. Then I noticed a hole in the bag. It was obvious–the mice had returned.

Further exploration of the pantry led me to find various bags of snack chips that had been penetrated and violated. And of course, the true calling cards of any mouse–tiny turd pellets–were everywhere.

After discarding all the mouse-ravaged foodstuffs, I cleaned the pantry floor. Then I covered it with an assortment of Home Depot-acquired traps and killing machines. I knew that I’d have to wait to see results–mice only come out when it’s dark and quiet.

Sure enough, while I slept, a mouse met its end in a plastic snapper trap baited with chunky Skippy peanut butter. I don’t think he was a lone gunmouse; it’s a safe bet that he has accomplices. Looking forward to seeing the body count tomorrow morning.

2 responses to “Mouse of the Rising Sun”

  1. Channel Z says :

    Sir, I’m sure the mouse problem is annoying as hell but at least you have a plan. Kill ‘em all and Godspeed.

    I was sad to read your post of 23 September. I wish I had a job to offer you, but I don’t. All I can say is, several years ago (well over a decade now, wow), I was living in a dorm in downtown Chicago and your voice was frequently heard by my roommates. Memories of your local music showcase, of your hilarious sparring with Tim Virgin, and of Q101 in general, will always have a spot on the mantle of radio and what makes it awesome (yes, awesome) in my mind. I know memories don’t pay the bills, but they do make life worth living. I love your post about taking a mancation with your son, by the way. Imagine what you’ve taught him about being a good dad and man during a time of hardship.

    You’re the man, JVO. And Q101 will never die.

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