Auto Show and Tell

I went to the Auto Show at McCormick Place for my first time ever yesterday. I’ve never been a “whatcha got under the hood” kinda guy (unless it was said as an obviously cheesy sexual metaphor), so a convention hall filled with cars never really sounded all that exciting to me. With guy card revocation at stake, I humbly admit that I generally view cars as a means to an end. I’m just not all that interested in fancy cars and the bells and whistles you can slap on them.

Some observations:

*Shockingly obese people love to look at cars. I wintessed scores of fanny-packed, churro-eating, monsters meandering their way through the hall like grazing cattle.

*I saw a lot of people with camcorders in hand, filming their favorite cars from top-to-bottom. It took me a while to realize that they weren’t filming the cars–they were filming the models next to them. Give me a “C!” Give me a “reepy!” What’s that spell?

*People are drawn to free stuff like maggots to rotting meat. Free keychain? How do I get one? Paper airplane? Gotta have it! I saw far too many normal-ish people debase themselves for useless crap that they otherwise wouldn’t look twice at.

Vroom, vroom.


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