Trick or Treat

The most egregious Trick or Treat advantage-taking was committed by various roaming packs of junior high thugs tonight. Throughout the evening, costumeless and bitter 12 and 13 year olds arrived at my front door with dirty pillowcase in hand, frowning as they hit me up for candy. Once in a blue moon, one of the thugs attempted to play along with Halloween, sporting either a hockey or “Scream” mask. If I were a parent of one of these kids, I’d stop him just as he was ready to leave and say, “Hey, you know what? You’re 13. Let’s go to Target–I’ll buy you your own damn bag of candy. Let’s leave the Trick or Treating to little 5-year old Jimmy down the street. He’s wearing a Pooh costume, and he’s pretty pumped about today. You’re just too damned old for this.”

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