Black Friday

Black Friday amazes me, year after year. People were lined up at six in the morning yesterday in front of places like Wal-Mart and Office Depot in the hopes of scoring bags of checkbook-friendly holiday deals. Six in the morning. That means that a lot of those people woke up in the 4 o’clock–maybe even the 3 o’clock–hour the morning after the Thanksgiving feeding frenzy just for the privilege of spending lots of money before most civilians even considered rolling out of bed.

The thought of dropping anchor in front of Wal-Mart at “kill me o’clock” in the morning just to get a competitive retail edge over Efrem and Bernice from Carpentersville sounds like hell on earth. Of course, the thought of Wal-Mart in any way, shape, or form sounds like hell on earth to me.

I have no doubt that there are great deals to be had. They won’t be the last great deals to be had this holiday season. I remain a fan of e-commerce for pretty much everything. I don’t have to drive around a parking lot, swearing at other motorists who edged me out of a spot, on my way to shop. I don’t have to view fellow shoppers as hated potential obstacles to my being able to provide a nice holiday for friends and family. I don’t have to stand outside. I don’t have to wait behind cranky families lumbering through checkout lines which are staffed by fried out, wish they could be anywhere but there, cashiers. I’ve just never been a fan of massively inconveniencing myself in order to give someone lots of my money.

One final note–if you do see me at Target between now and December 25, it’s just because I’m out of toilet paper and I like to buy large quantities to stock the linen closet with. I also like their hand soaps.

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