I read comic books. Because of that, I tend to see every half-baked, style-over-substance, big budget movie adaptation of a comic or graphic novel. Okay, I haven’t seen “300″ yet, but I’ve never been much for gladiator movies.

Because of my weakness, I found myself in a cold theater this afternoon watching “TMNT.” I confess to a love of the Ninja Turtles. They’re giant turtles who know martial arts and fight crime–impossible to hate, by my estimation.

The movie was an awkward mess. It was too violent and dark (even dark looking; the whole damn movie looked like it was animated in mud) for kids and too unfunny and uninspired for adults. The plot was certainly more convoluted than any kid under ten could possibly grasp and one Foot Clan too many for any other movie-goer.

I wanted to love it. Unfortunately my fondest memory from the film is of an extended Turtle belch, which was already a key selling point in the trailer.

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