Maynard James Keenan: Mythbuster

I curse the internet as often as I celebrate it.  Thanks to the internet, the sense of mystery and danger that bands once worked so hard to build and maintain no longer exists.  Ours is an age of transparency, where rock illusion is easily shattered by a few well-aimed clicks.  I want my bands to have a mythology that reads like Zeus and Hades on a cocaine bender.  Reality always gets in the way.

Tool has long been a band that I’ve pigeonholed as living in the darkest, most insidious, depths of the human psyche.  I’ve worked hard to avoid information to the contrary.  All bets are off at this point.

Outside of performing with Tool, Puscifer, and A Perfect Circle, Maynard James Keenan is also an owner of Merkin Vineyards and Caduceus Cellars, in Arizona.  The very fact that his winery exists tells me that Maynard has been outside during sunlight hours.  A cornerstone to my imagined Tool mythology:  Shattered.

To his credit, Keenan’s non-rock job involves alcohol and is named after something pretty obnoxious (look up “merkin,” if you must).  Everything you’d ever want to know about Keenan’s “straight job” will be revealed in a documentary called “Blood Into Wine,” scheduled for February release:

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